For Gag Lovers

I apologize for taking more time than I should have to post this piece from a young reader, a university student, who wrote me originally about how he got turned on to bondage thanks to the Walt Disney movie Aladdin (see What Aladdin in Chains Did for Me), and went on to write me about his great love for gags.

 

WHY I LOVE GAGS

 

Gags seem to me the epitome and completion of surrender, total submission and abandon, which is why they are so critically essential for me. The gag is the ultimate device when it comes to fully giving yourself over and experiencing the pleasure of being totally helpless and taken care of. In fact, for me it’s more about being gagged & bound than bound & gagged. 

 

Obviously a gag is the barrier to signaling for any sort of help. To me, what is the point of going through the trouble of “kidnapping” and tying someone up to put them at your mercy if you leave them free to let others know what’s happening to them. That makes a gag essential, even if nobody seems to be around. Why take the chance that somebody may be there? (On a personal note, I like scenes and fantasies that involve other people being close, with the victim shouting desperately, but unable to convey his predicament to outsiders).

 

The sounds emitted through gags get me instantly aroused. The talking and the mmmphing corresponds well to the typical noises involved with sex. A loud, yet muffled mmmph is striking and instant. And to me, it’s essential. It’s a sign of activity and tension within a bondage scene. If the actor or sub does nothing to struggle, he becomes less attractive and pleasing to the eye. There is no conflict, no sense of tension to appreciate. After all, bondage is a form of entertainment, close to an art to me. If you don’t feel it, act it out.

 

In terms of aesthetics, I find the faces of guys become infinitely hotter with the lower face covered. I can never really explain why, just as people can’t adequately explain preferences for race and/or gender. We appreciate what we appreciate and rationalize it after the fact. Who knows, maybe the purported associations I have with gags brought my love for them out. But, for me, tape, cloth, or a handkerchief really smooths and frames a guy’s face beautifully.

 

That is why I personally tend to not like ball gags or bit gags. They do the work, but the aesthetic aspect is missing because you see the facial contortions involved. You see the mouth stretched, as you see the face bulge over a tape gag if the dom doesn't take time to smooth it out. Ball gags and bit gags are great, but only if they are just a part of a layer. To me, the perfect gag will always have an over the mouth (OTM) look to it.

 

For me, personally, a gag serves as an incentive not to ask questions of myself or my dom. I have a tendency to overanalyze and freak out and speak my mind. A gag, especially one that is put on with extra attention, is enough to calm me down and relax me so I don’t disturb the scene. This is not to advocate no safe signal or word. I firmly believe in the consent and safety of all participants. Since I like gags most of all, my own safe signal is a melody that I mmmph in order to convey a complaint or precaution.

 

Finally, for me, bondage is all about not only restraining a guy but reinforcing restraints. For example, you handcuff a guy. That puts the sub where he belongs. But then you tie his handcuffed wrists together. The sub begins to realize just how very tied up he is. Then you tape his roped, cuffed wrists. I’m a big fan of adding insult to injury. And finally you put chains on both his arms. The purpose of all the additional restraints is humiliation, objectification, and challenge to the dom. Obviously, the rope, tape and chains are not really needed to achieve the restraining purpose because the sub is clearly not going to get out (unless he is Harry Houdini, in which case bring more on :)). But they do serve to challenge and taunt the sub. They convey to him that if he thought there was a chance of getting out, that chance is gone. They are also a way for the dom to say, I am doing this to you because I can.

 

For me, it’s the same thing with multi-layered gags. When your mouth is stuffed, cleaved, and taped, is a cloth over it really that necessary? But for me, those additional layers carry the gag that extra mile. Gags reinforce the ropes/chains/etc, because the mouth cannot be used to stretch or bite at them. But the gag is also reinforced by the bondage. I see a guy mmmphing, and I think: “that gag is not coming off.” When I see the legs restrained and the wrists tied out of reach of the guy’s face, I KNOW the gag is not coming off. 

 

And finally, gags complete the bondage experience by really turning the subject into an object, without personality or humanity. When that happens, he truly becomes the property of the dom until the dom lets him go. In life, how important is the speech we convey to others? We talk, we converse, we gossip. We also show emotion, express our individuality and influence people and their lives with words. In the gag/bondage scene, we are incapable of doing any of that.

 

When you are confined and restrained so that you can't move by yourself, it’s humiliating and degrading, putting you at the mercy of your captor. The gag takes all that to the another extreme, taking away the very essence of your humanity and individuality, your voice. You can't scream, and you can't persuade. The dom is immune to your clamors of emotion and expression, and instead takes pleasure in your mmmphs. It is hot, and it really makes you nothing but a passive agent that does not act, but is acted upon. With someone like me who wants to let others take control and responsibility, it is perfect.

 

There you go. Let me know if you want additional comments on the gags I particularly like, or the techniques I use. It is great to take part in a bondage discussion.

 

I told this writer that I did want additional comments about the gags he particular likes, and this is what he wrote back:

 

“Well, here’s one that involves a gag utilizing only tape. Now, I prefer cleaves or stuffing the mouth, but this is a great way to show that you can use one type of thing and still get results.

 

Now, I tend to use duct tape of some sort to start. The first thing is to get a sort of lock on the jaw. So I take 3 to 4 strips and go from under the chin to ear level. I make sure it is pulled TIGHT, otherwise it is not going to work. Then, I use strips to cover the face. Usually 3 or 4, and each strip is longer than the last. So each strip has a little bit of extra skin making it harder to pull off if the tongue presses. Once the lower face is covered, I tend to use medical or athletic tape to do wrap arounds just because it doesn't hurt as much to pull off. Usually 5 or 6 wrap arounds. And then, the final strips over the lower face are just to smooth it out and give it a pleasing look.

 

I asked the writer to describe his ideal “layered” gag. Unfortunately I don't have any pics which will begin to do justice to his description, which I find mouth watering, or at any rate filling.

 

Update, January 29th: The writer just sent me some pics of himself gagged the way he likes to be. Here they are:

As far as layers go, there are 4 essential layers to the standard gag. It is aesthetically pleasing and also effective at silencing me.

 

First, I have to have something stuffed in my mouth. Usually a small ankle sock. Gauze pads that you find in the medical aisle work really well with this. I have a small gag reflex, so I don't stuff the mouth entirely, but it produces the effect. I want to try a sponge in my mouth because it compresses when you need it to, yet expands if you try to open your mouth.

 

Next, a cleave gag of some sort pulled tight to seal the stuffer inside. A long sock, tie, or handkerchief will suffice.

 

Then, I do the tape layers like the one I told you about in the previous email.

 

And then finally, some sort of cloth towel or rag to tie in a detective fashion.

 

He concluded with these words:

 

Will others be responding to this?

 

I told him I couldn’t answer that, but hoped so. And—update—this posting seems to have hit a chord, since we seldom get so many responses so fast. Why don't some of you write me at greater length about the gags you're particularly fond of, and why. Don't do this just as short comments, but write me about them at length and in detail, with or without accompanying photos. 

 

 

 

Comments

[Travis]

I love this post the best. I love to be hooded and gagged because it's more fun that way.

I love duct tape because you are really really hopeless in this. Also I love the smell of the tape. It's very rewarding.

When I get the tape gag, I tend to put a bandanna around it and then add more tape.

He sounds a great guy to be gagged by.

[Jeff Moses]

Although I prefer leather gags, I agree that a gag that covers the lower part of the face makes the bottom hotter. I think it allows me to imagine the "perfect" face. It may also have something to do with making the eyes more prominent.
I usually put the gag on last. It sort of says, "That's it boy. Now you're all mine."

[Robbo]

Another gag lover!!

Great to be bound tightly. Then struggling as the bandana is forced into mymouth as a cleave gag. Then another bandana tied wide as a gag. A real silencer. A cock gag has the same affect on me!!

Struggle ,mmmmmppphhh,....

I feel my cock showing its appreciation as
I write this...

Cheers

[Jon]

I have to say I agree with all parts of this post. To me, bondage, and being at the mercy of a top/dom, isn't complete unless the gag is obviously tight, has multiple layers, or if a muzzle/leather gag, locked on. Watching a guy get gagged, struggling and yelling ineffectually as he's brutally silenced, is my favorite part of any scene. And I look forward to the day I have someone who is eager to pull that tape tight, tight over my mouth, and begin silencing me for a fun night.

[Gaggedboy]

Loved this gagged blog, Bob. I have always been a gag lover and love duct tape the best. This is one of the easist ways to silence the boy as well as the best look. I do love the layered effect too. But there is nothing better than a gagged boy with duct tape in any position that turns me on. Even better if I am that gagged boy. (Hence my screen name.)